finding myself enjoying a holiday. i’m usually a bit down for thanksgiving and christmas. a lot of what ifs and could haves cloud my holidays. but finding myself spending thanksgiving with my sister has brightened holidays. she has amazingly given me a beautiful camera of which to view my world differently.
suddenly possibilities are opening up to me surrounding my feelings on my world. completely intertwined with what i want, and not what i do to appease those around me. it’s become a frequent topic in my life as of late. a lot of what i do is because i feel like it’s whats expected. or like theres this competition that i’m forced to compete in, even if i find it trivial. the hard truth is that im struggling for something i dont want.
all this came to realization as a fell for someone. a wonderful, caring, supportive, handsome and…
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